I was recently spotted in THIS VIDEO attempting to outrun Clinical Mediocrity, AI-generated Doggerel, Tribalistic Groupthink, and Old Age. I left the first three in the dust…#4 is a different story!

So I’m sprinting in the video, so no matter what, I’m in the Cool Guy Club with all the Social Media Bros.  But one of the more annoying things often stated in these Influencer Circles is that “distance running is terrible for you and just makes you weak, slow, and skinny fat.”  And then they put some picture of a jacked guy on all the not-so-secret sauce next to a recreational marathon runner.

Well, this is clearly a false dichotomy…if you want to see how “skinny fat and slow” distance runners are, watch THIS RACE and read THIS ARTICLE.  And just understand that, however fast you think you are, almost any good distance runner could out-sprint you at any distance from 10 yards to 10 miles. 

That said, sprinting is AWESOME, and sadly, many people stop sprinting as they age.  But all too often, some middle-aged Weekend Warrior gets motivated to sprint again for the first time since High School Football and blows both of his hamstrings, tears his Achilles, and deals a mortal wound to the vestiges of his pride in the process.  So a few things to consider if you’re thinking about getting back into sprinting:

–Building up TISSUE TOLERANCE for running is important…and oftentimes this requires some (gasp) JOGGING in order to accept the increased demands of more high-velocity movement.

–WARMING UP, sometimes for an obnoxiously long time, is critical for injury prevention.  Those days where you could roll out of bed and start dunking basketballs in a semi-conscious state are long gone.

–Finding a flight of stairs and/or a moderate incline is a much more forgiving way to build up toward sprinting on flat surfaces…you’re much less likely to tear your hamstrings into ribbons.  And starting at an effort level significantly below 100% is a generally good idea.

-Although sprinting is phenomenal, you can reap the metabolic benefits of sprinting without actually sprinting.  If you find a rowing machine, Assault Bike, or another similar torture apparatus and truly go all-out for 20-30 seconds, you will turn your body into a metabolic furnace.  And if you do it right for 4-6 repetitions, you’ll probably feel like you’re going to puke…which clearly means that it’s working, right?

As always, Movement is Medicine, Motion is Lotion, and if exercise were a drug, it would be a miracle pill.  Doing something is better than nothing. God gave us bodies to move and minds to learn, so why would you want to stop either of those things? But “Live to Fight Another Day” is also an important mantra as we collectively battle to “not get old.”